Monday, June 30, 2014

On the SCOTUS Decisions Regarding Women's Rights...

(TRIGGER WARNING!!! For all the women out there, this post is probably VERY TRIGGERY. Please be aware of this before you read it.)
To all the men out there who have daughters, nieces, granddaughters or hope to have them someday, this is for you.

I want you to take a minute and imagine saying this:

“I’m sorry, honey. You don’t have the right…”

You don’t have the right to birth control pills, even if they’re deemed medically necessary because you have ovarian cysts or uterine cancer or any number of other conditions that require them to make your body whole and well. Because the men of this country have determined that the religious rights of someone you don’t even know – someone with a penis - are more important than your life.

You don’t have the right to protect your body from unplanned pregnancy. If you don’t want to get pregnant, don’t have sex with boys. Besides, if you’re having sex that makes you a slut and a whore. So you deserve to get pregnant.

No, boys can’t be sluts or whores. Boys are exempt from that title because they have penises. And the needs of their penises trump your right to protect yourself. In fact, they are encouraged to enlighten everyone about their conquest of you so that everyone can know your vagina is open for business. And then you will be expected to provide access for other penises by default. Sure, you can ask the boys to cover their penis with a condom, but penises don’t like to be covered. You should have planned for that before you opened your vagina for business.

No. You don’t have the right to go to a doctor or a clinic and ask about birth control. Only sluts and whores ask to be put on birth control. If you do choose to do that, then you have to accept the consequences of that action.

If you do want birth control, you will have to walk the Gauntlet of Shame to get to the clinic that provides that sort of thing. You will be expected to look at pictures of dead fetuses. You will have to endure the insults people shout at you. You will be spit at and shoved by complete strangers. You will have to stop and listen to people explaining their religious beliefs to you. These people will also explain why you’re going to Hell in detail. They will give you pamphlets about it. They will attempt to block you from entering the clinic. There is a distinct possibility you will die in the attempt because some of these religious people believe the only way to protect fetuses is by killing the mothers. Yes, I know that doesn’t make sense, but the courts have ruled that fetuses and penises are more important than your life.

If you somehow manage to gain access to birth control, you will have to pay for it yourself. Insurance will not cover it, because it is a choice. It’s expensive, so you may have to give up other things to afford it. Why? You are choosing to be a whore. No, it doesn't matter if you need it for medical reasons. There is no good reason for birth control.

You could also lose your job for taking birth control. So you will have to do it in secret. Why? Your employer’s rights are more important than your body or your life. If they don’t like you taking birth control, you can’t take it.

And what happens if you do get pregnant?

Abortion is not a viable option. It doesn’t matter if your body is not mature enough to carry this child. It doesn’t matter if the child has multiple birth defects. It doesn’t matter if the pregnancy puts your life at risk. You will carry this child, you will give birth to this child, and you will devote the rest of your life to raising it, whether you like it or not, on your own.

No, the father doesn’t have that same responsibility. You’re the slut. You’re the one that allowed him access to your vagina. It’s your fault and your problem. Sure, you can make him cover some finances, but he doesn’t have to commit to the same degree of lifetime care as you do.  He’s a boy. His penis exempts him from the consequences.

Yes, you can get financial help from the government. But you will have to endure humiliation and shame to receive it. After all, you shouldn’t have had a child if you couldn’t afford it. Bottom feeder. Whore. Slut.

What if you are raped?

That doesn’t matter. There are religious groups who believe that pregnancy from rape is a miracle and their rights to believe that trump your rights to survive what is a life-altering violation. Religious rights outweigh your rights. Get over it. It was probably your fault, anyway. That’s the government’s - a body largely made up of penis carrying members - stance on the subject.

Okay, yes, there are places that provide counseling and help should you find yourself pregnant and unable or unwilling to care for a child, but to get to them you will have to travel long distances and endure the Gauntlet of Shame. You remember that? Dead fetuses. Spitting. Shoving. Religious shaming. Slut shaming. Death threats. Humiliation. Hate.

This is what it means to be a woman in America, sweetheart. Accept it. You have no right to make decisions to protect your body. There is no choice for you.

Can you see yourself saying that??

Stand up for your daughters, for your nieces, for your granddaughters and their rights. 

This is America. But its not the America I grew up in and its not the America I want my son or future grandchildren to grow up in. Women have the right to make decisions about their own bodies and their health.

(If you're curious, I'm the mother of one wonderful young man with Aspergers Syndrome. I was a shy, introverted, Catholic 16 yr old when I was put on birth control because of ovarian cysts. They damaged my left ovary and landed me in the emergency room. Despite that, my father didn't speak to me for 4 months after it because it meant I 'could' have sex. It was a traumatic experience. I never even kissed a boy until I was 19! Given the choice, no matter my circumstances, I would never choose abortion. That's my choice. But I believe its a viable, reasonable option and needs to be available. Same goes for birth control. And that's more than you need to know.)